Here we go..............my business requires that we are able to be reached 24/7. This is because should we have a customer whose equipment has broken down and they need their plant back up and running, we need to send a service tech out ASAP.
After hours, we transfer the phones to a cell phone, which happens to be my fuckin cell phone. So, if a customer calls at 3:00 fucking AM, my fuckin phone rings. As you may recall from an earlier post, I ain't any fuckin good without coffee when I just wake up and answering my cell at 3:00 AM certainly doesn't allow for that to happen. Oh, I've tried other methods regarding our 24/7 phone number. 1st, I had the phones forwarded to a pager with a fairly lengthy recording, with detailed fuckin instructions, such as: 1. Leave your name, 2. Leave a FUCKIN NUMBER, 3. Leave your FUCKIN EXTENSION TOO!. Some of these fuckin people are about as sharp as bag of wet fuckin mice. You would think these fuckin instructions would be detailed enough. Yeah, one would fuckin think that. I can't tell you how many fuckin times that motherfuckin pager would go off at some ungodly hour only for me to call it back and get the message. I'd then call the dumb-fuck back at the fuckin number HE left only to get "I'm sorry, our office is now closed. Please call back between 8:00-5:00. If you know the persons extension, please enter it now". WTF?? This cocksucker has his plant down, 120 people standing around doin nuthin, gettin paid, and this fucking genius wants to make me guess an extension?? Lets see, how many fuckin combinations are there to any given 2 or 3 digit possibilities? FUCK!! I mean ya know whats going to happen..I don't dare fall back asleep cuz I know this fuckwad is going to call back, sometime, after he doesn't get a return call. Sure enough, 30-45 minutes would go by, and the fuckin pager goes off again. Call it, same fuckin message, no extension, and this time the guys PISSED because, guess what, no one has called his trailer-livin ass back! Anyway, shit like this caused me to go to 'Option 2'.
'Option 2' was to alternate the pager between myself and 3 of my service guys. This lasted about a fuckin month because my service guys have the phone skills of a fuckin doorknob. So, I went to 'Option 3' which is the aforementioned.
This morning, 4:27 AM, cell phones ringing;
Me: (barely audible)....hello?
Customer: Who's this?
Me: .........(irritated by that lack of phone courtesy)....Whoucallin?
Customer: Efen's company.
Customer: This is 'just spent over 120K buying your equipment' and the fuckin thing is down.
Me: Hmmmm....that's not good
Customer: No shit it ain't good. I need someone NOW.
Me: Uh....can you tell me the problem?
He proceeds which leads me to about 20 other fuckin questions. After I get a clearer picture of the problem, I tell him I can't do anythhing until the manufacturer opens and that isn't until 8:00 AM. Surprisingly he says "Oh, no problem, we have back-up equipment we can run.....I'm leaving at 7:00 but you can call 'Day-time Boss' back..sorry if I woke you...I guess I should have had him call at a better hour". WTF???? Are you fuckin serious?......"sorry IF you woke me"......a "BETTER hour???????" MOTHERFUCK!!!
Don't get me wrong, these customers who are the ones we make our money from and I'll do anything to help out any of them.....just PLEASE use your fuckin head before going to 'Auto Dial!'
Oh.....still trying to get this problem taken care of.....almost 9 1/2 hours later......