My Introduction

First of all, I have no fuckin idea as to why I'm doing this. I think I'll blame it on my good friend Laura (livinglaura.blogspot.com). I had to set up an account to reply to her 'blog' which I guess automatically gives me my own 'blog'. Speaking of, from this point forward, you'll never, ever, see the typed word 'blog' again. I hate that fucking term. Back in 'the day', I did my fair share of 'posts', and that is simply what they should be called and will be, on this 'Forum'.




As you may have surmised, I use the "F" word and all of its derivatives .......frequently. To those of you that do not know me, you may be thinking 'He uses that word because he's under-educated, ignorant, and a by-product of parents who used foul language as a common form of communication'. Well, you may be right except for the last part. The strongest words I've ever heard either of my parents say is 'Son-of-a-bitch'. Basically, I just the like the word, so if you're offended, go the fuck somewhere else.




A little background on myself. I'm married (2nd time), have a 21 YO daughter, and own a business since '93. While owning your own business has its perks the fucking headaches are beyond belief. This isn't limited to those that are owners but to anyone that has any supervisory role, you know exactly what I fucking mean. Examples will be a separate post of its own, probably a 3-parter.

I am a firm believer in that every person should be held accountable for his/her actions. That every person should be responsible for their choices and the direct consequences that result, good or bad. I hate these fucking whiners that blame everything on someone else, that nothing is ever their fault, that someone else should be helping them with their lives, jobs, family, etc etc. Fuck them. These are the same people that never do one damn thing to help themselves. They don't show any extra initiative, just do the bare minimum in their jobs but bitch and moan they aren't being paid enough. The reason their kids (wives, husbands, siblings, etc) are so fucked up is because somewhere along the way someone else is the cause. Grow the fuck up and quit with excuses. Better yet, look in the fucking mirror, if your double-wide has one.

Now I realize I may come across as one grouchy mfer and in reality, I guess I am. But...I prefer to characterize myself as one who looks at the world as it should be instead of how it is. Basically, I have no patience or tolerance for whiners, stupid, or lazy people but I find some of my funniest/angriest encounters over the years have been with this ever-growing sub-class.




An example of this:



I am the lone trustee (supposed to be 3) of my subdivision (because no one else would do it) and have been for 10 years. It's a small subdivision, 16 homes, and when I agreed to do it, I thought 'just how much fucking work can it be'? We have a small 'common ground' area at the end of the cul-de-sac and I had a company cut and maintain that area for years. That is until 'Looks-like-a-guy-fat-bitch' moved in across the street. Next thing I know, I get a letter she sends out threatening 'litigation' against the trustee (me) because she believes there is some sort of 'collusion' going on between the trustee (still me) and the owner of the landscaping company because she has found out that I know him on a personal basis (translation: I'm getting a huge kick-back from the gifuckingnormous $100 we pay him). Okay, this actually pisses me off and more than just alittle. Keep in mind no one else wants this fucking job and no one EVER offers to help in any form and this 'LLAGFB' hasn't lived here for more than a month and yet she can stir the fucking pot because 90% of my fucking neighbors are transplants from where they were the sole village idiots and they will believe practically anything they're told! So it starts, the fucking morons from the end of the street band together ('band' may be a little strong cuz there were only 3 of them 2 guys, 1 gal, including a Chinese guy who I had to 'threaten' a few years back to take down his fucking Christmas lights........in JUNE..WTF...didn't even know they knew what Christmas was. Not racist, just ignorant I guess).



I can be open-minded and will, at times, certainly listen to another's point of view, but in the following scenario, you can pretty much throw that crap out the fuckin window. It went something like this:



Mob: We got this letter. We'd like to talk to you about it.



Me: Yes, I got it too. Whats on your mind (very fuckin little but I was being polite)?



Mob: We're alittle concerned about this allegation, ya know, about you having, er, uh, ties with the lawn guy.



Me: Ties? I know the guy, he's honest, reliable, and insured. Do you really think I'm taking kick-backs?



Mob: Uh, no, no, its just , well, is it cheaper if they aren't insured?



Me: It is. But, if they get hurt they can sue the whole subdivision and take every penny you have. Is that your preference? (I am really close to losing what little patience that I have)



Mob: No, thats okay then but the $100 is way out of line!



Me: You have to keep in mind that the common ground is steep and in some places rocky. All he has to do is hit a rock and it will cost him more than a $100 to replace that blade on his $6000 commercial mower (that part went right over their collective dumbfuck heads).



Mob: We think he should do it for $50.00



Me: Ok, the subdivision will pay one of you $50 to do it.



Mob: We pay people for that.



Me: Thats what I've been doing.



Mob: You need to make some calls and set up some appointments and see where we can get the best price. And...this should be done ASAP so we don't incur anymore of those high-priced charges.



Ok, I take full responsibility for allowing this to happen. While never overly-friendly to these jack-fucks, I would give them that quick 2-finger wave while I was outside cutting my grass or something. That was a mistake. I led them to believe that they could come on my fuckin property without an invitation, ring my fuckin doorbell, and then proceed to talk to me like I gave a motherfuckin shit about what they had to say. I am happy to say that I remedied that with the following and I highly doubt it will ever in a million fuckin years occur again.



Me: Ok, you want me to make phone calls and set up meetings, to take off work or come home early to meet with landscapers because you think that we can save $50. Is that about right?



Mob: Well, you are the trustee and it is your responsibility.



Me...with my pissed voice (and I think you will agree by that I have been more than civil...up to this point) : Let me get some things straight here. I am the fuckin trustee because not one other fuckin person would volunteer nor do any of you ever ask to help in some way. On top of that, every one of you people are fuckin retired, home every motherfuckin day and you want me to make phone calls and you want me take off work to meet them?? Do any of you see the irony in this fucking conversation? (I could tell....they either didn't or had no fuckin clue what I meant). I tell you what the fuck I am going to do. I'm calling the landscape guy that I'm running the "scam" with and telling him not to cut any more. Then, I'm not going to do one fucking thing about replacing him. You do see that my house is on the opposite end from the common ground...do you for one fucking moment think I give a fuck if that ever gets cut?? I can't fucking see it, it won't bother me, so now its your fucking problem to take care of. You make the calls, you make the appointments BUT nothing, and I repeat NOTHING gets done or PAID unless you submit it to me because being the sole trustee, I have to authorize everything!



The 'Mob' mumbled some shit about me getting defensive and left, well, left when I closed the fuckin door on them. The next day I called the grass cutter told him the deal, he agreed with me, 'fuck them' he said. They still haven't found someone to cut and from what I've heard, $125 was the cheapest they found but he didn't have Insurance.



LLAGFB has her house up for sale. What a fuckin bitch, starts all this shit when she had to know she was going to be moving. My only regret.....I wasn't the reason for her moving.



Ok, thats all I got today. Really didn't mean to go into 'Rant' mode, but WTF, it is my 'post'.