Thursday, November 13, 2008

I'M NOT INEPT....I'm just stoopid

Took my SUV into the the dealer Tuesday for a 're-call'. While I was there, I told them about some other problems I was having and could they fix them while they had it. "Sure"...was what the Service Manager told me. It'll be ready Thursday, he said.

When I asked for my 'loaner' vehicle, I got that 'I don't speak Portuguese' look. So, I repeated my question...s-l-o-w-l-y.

SM: You mean a rental?

Me: No...I don't mean that at all.

SM: Well, we don't give loaners. We do rentals.

Me: Yeah, I kinda figured out you rented cars.....but when I bought this that was the one thing I insisted on. That whenever I brought this vehicle in here, warranty, oil change, whatthefuckever, I got a loaner.....NOT a rental...and not just any loaner, but one as close to possible as my vehicle. (Startin to get a little pissed)

SM: Uh....SOOOOOOO...you're salesman set that up? And, just who was that?

Me: (WTF...is this guy like the Principle of the Car Dealer?) It was 'so and so'.

SM: Well, he's retired (Sayin it in that 'na nanna na na' fuckin voice)

Me: Okay....I'm not gonna argue this shit with you...call "Dave" (He owns the fuckin place and he always says in his commercials that if you have any problem 'Just call Dave').

SM: (Gettin red in the face) I'm not gonna do that...this is my department, my call.

Me: Listen...I don't have time for this bullshit. I'll go find him myself...I know where his office is.

SM: Sir...you'll have to move your vehicle first. I have other customers to wait on and you have the lane tied up.

Me: (walking away) The keys are in it. Be careful where you park it.

Oh man....did this piss the fucker off. I thought he was coming over his 'Service Throne'

SM: (loudly) SIR....MOVE YOUR TRUCK...NOW!

Me: (loudly as well cuz I didn't like him using 'NOW') LIKE I SAID...MOVE IT YOURSELF...AND DON'T FORGET YOU HAVE SECURITY CAMERAS WATCHING WHAT YOU DO!

And...away I went to find 'Dave', which didn't take long. Dave's office is huge...with probably 30 pictures of him and some local celeb, along with his numerous awards for who-the-fuck-knows...or cares. I knock even though his door is open.

Dave: (Being as sickly sweet as he is in those fuckin commercials) C'mon in, Buddy...what can I do for you? Have a seat...like sumthin to drink? (as he motioned towards his 60 fuckin cubic foot wood paneled built-in refigerator)

Me: No, no thanks........

So I proceed to tell him what had just occurred and how I wasn't very happy. He gets on his phone, calls the SM....listens, nods, says a few 'uh-huhs', and hangs up.

Dave: (chuckles alittle) Efen, well...you really got under his skin, didn't you?

Me: (not chuckling, even alittle) Dave (we're like family now, I guess)...I appreciate you have a business to run and I know how difficult dealing with customers can be. But, I want to tell you one thing. IF one of my employee's EVER spoke to a customer like that guy did to me, I'd fire his fuckin ass so fast he wouldn't know what happened. Like you, as you say in your commercials, I value my customers, doesn't matter if they're right or wrong, and it's because they're the ones that pay my bills.

Dave: You're right, Efen. Lemme call him. You go ahead back and it will be all straightened out by the time you're there. Uh..unless you'd just as soon we bring the loaner round front to you?

Me: Appreciate it, Dave ,but no, I don't have a problem going back there. I'm not worried about it....or scared (then I chuckle).

Dave chuckles too, we shake hands, and off I go. Get back to the SM desk and he's all apologetic and shit. I'm sure Dave told him how to act cuz I know he didn't fuckin mean a word of it.

Then he says....I'm not inept...but sometimes I can be a little stupid. Hmmm...not sure if those were his words or Daves. If they were his, them I am really fucking impressed.....because I would have bet a million dollars he didn't know the meaning of 'inept'.

7 comments:

Warped Mind of Ron said...

ROFLMFAO... How do you walk around with Balls that big! You are my new Idol.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

That guy totally deserved what he got. That is NOT the way to treat a customer. When you pick your vehicle up, check all the hidey spots to make sure he doesn't take a dump in it! LOL.

Gator Foodie said...

Yep, the customer's always right...glad to see "Dave" thought so too! :) I'll have to remember the "security camera" part next time I take my car in ;)

Elle said...

And this, boys and girls, is why Efen has been my enforcer, henchman, and all-around wiseguy for years now :)

LOL @ "The Dave and Efen Show"

The Girl said...

That was great! Will you go with me next time someone tries to bully and embarrass me, because the customer is always right, never applies to me. How freaking cool are you? Lovin you.

J Fab said...

I'm a little late readin this one... but I would have done the exact funking thing. I would not have done one single thing differently either. TOO funny.

Stay in school kids.

Anonymous said...

Thats a great story. I hate how the "service" industry has changed to the "fuckin deal with it" industry. I take customer service seriously. Good for you.